The Lesson is in the Listening

How Openness to Learning Makes You a Better Gardener (and Person).

I had a moment recently that made me think about how we learn and grow, not just in gardening, but in life. It started with a question posted in a gardening group on Facebook. Someone was asking if they should use Round-Up to kill some grass. I jumped in and said, “No, it will kill the soil as well, which will negatively affect the other plants nearby.” I offered an alternative solution.

Then, someone responded, saying that my statement wasn’t true, and I shouldn’t spread misinformation. And to be honest, that upset me. I replied with a bit of a snarky tone (which I’m not proud of) and said he was wrong and shouldn’t spread misinformation himself.

His response surprised me. He said he’d look into it but was pretty sure I didn’t know what I was talking about. At that moment, I realized this could go one of two ways: we could just go back and forth arguing, or I could take a deep breath and approach this differently. I decided to explain my point calmly and clearly, the way I would to a good friend. No arrogance, no attitude—just sharing what I know because I’ve studied this topic extensively.

To my surprise, he responded with, “Thank you. We learn something new every day. Thanks for explaining.” I thought that was so cool. He actually listened, took the time to understand, and quickly changed his stance when he realized there was more to the story than he initially thought.

What an awesome life skill! It made me like the guy immediately.

As this was happening, another person chimed in with a similar disagreement. I responded to them in the same way—keeping it simple and explaining the reasoning behind what I was saying. The second person also replied with, “Thanks for furthering my understanding, this makes sense.”

How refreshing, right? In a world where so many people just want to argue or dig in their heels, these two were able to have an actual conversation, listen with an open mind, and be willing to update their beliefs based on new information. It wasn’t about me being right. It was about the fact that they had no pride standing in the way of their ability to learn something new.

This is the Mindset You Need as a Gardener

Here’s the thing: being open to learning and being willing to change your mind isn’t just a good life skill—it’s an essential mindset for being a good gardener. You NEVER know it all. You’re always experimenting, failing, adjusting your approach, and updating your beliefs based on what you observe in the garden. That’s how you get better.

The best gardeners I know are the ones who are always quick to say, “I don’t know it all,” and they’re constantly curious about new methods, different plants, or why something didn’t work the way they thought it would. The most experienced ones aren’t the most dogmatic. They’re the most flexible and open-minded because they know that the more they learn, the more they realize there’s so much more they don’t know.

This is Also How You Grow in Life

This mindset doesn’t just apply to gardening. It’s a good way to approach life. If you’re too firm in your beliefs, too proud to admit you don’t know something, or too quick to dismiss ideas that challenge your current thinking, you’re not leaving any room for growth. The wisest people are the ones who, no matter how much they’ve achieved or learned, still approach the world with a sense of humility and a willingness to learn.

So, whether you’re talking to a fellow gardener about soil health, trying out a new growing technique, or just navigating a difference of opinion in your daily life, remember this: Be willing to listen. Be open to change. Be humble enough to learn something new, even if it challenges what you thought you knew.

That’s how you become a better gardener, a better learner, and, ultimately, a better person. Because, as I learned from that simple interaction on Facebook, growth doesn’t just happen in the garden. It happens in the way we communicate, the way we handle disagreements, and the way we allow ourselves to be open to change. And in that sense, there’s always something new to learn every day. 🌱